Signs Your Boundaries Need Attention

Our emotions are a huge part of our life. I am saying this because the way we think and our emotions have a profound effect on one another. Our thoughts trigger our emotions. The environment and people we are surrounded by is also contributing factor.

For us to understand ourselves and emotion we need to take stock of what is happening around us, even in our minds.

Ask yourself “Am I giving too much of my time to others?” or “Am I overthinking?” The danger is in both.

Here are 6 signs your boundaries may need attention.

  • You are exhausted and drained
  • You feel incomplete without others
  • You can’t say no to others
  • You accepy unwanted affection
  • You are resentful and upset
  • Justifying someone’s behaviour
  • Settling for less than what you deserve
  • Allowing your space to be invaded

What kind of people are you allowing in your life? Are they overstepping their boundaries? Then, it is time for a self-check. You have the right to take time out to put mechanisms in place to cater to yourself. Don’t make a monument of such burden as they are poisonous, and therefore, only you have the power to set the rules and manage your relationships.

Below I give you an idea of boundaries to set for yourself.

  • Set aside time for self-care – your mental and emotional well-being is important.
  • Set quiet time in order to reflect on whats good and right for you.
  • Avoid the television and social media to detox from social ills.
  • Value your opinion
  • Avoid gossiping and bringing others down
  • Vet and schred your friends list. In the virtual and real world
  • Avoid sharing personal information with random people
  • Be assertive and ensure your perception of boundaries are healthy

In every relationship in your life, it is critical to set boundaries. It’s not your job to make others happy. Whether it is emotional, physical or mental boundary it is vital for you to set boundaries to protect your space and personal development.

Form greater awareness of your needs. Once you know who you are and what you need you will be able to recognize where to draw your boundary lines.

You deserve all the happiness in the world. Embrace your reality and glow with confidence and grace.

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Protect Your Energetic Space

Energy vampires? Yes! People who intentionally or unintentionally; emotionally and mentally drain you. They feed on your kindness and your listening skills. Have you ever had this experience? What did you do? How did it make you feel?

They leave you exhausted and overwhelmed. Nevertheless, you keep entertaining them and they keep coming back for more.

I recall having a friend who fits this description. Once we’re not around each other this individual would SMS me all day. At the end of the day, I’d count about 250-300 SMS. It was a mental wreck for me, being someone who likes my space. Unregrettable, I gradually remove myself from such a horrid experience. Protect your energy from this toxic behaviour and save a great amount of emotional distress.

These are some behaviours of an Energy Vampire.

Engage in passive-aggressive behaviour: this person might act excited as if they agree with you and subsequently not follow through with what was agreed upon. However, they will respond by behaving in a resentful and hostile manner.

They will force relationships to work: they will throw drama at you acting as though the relationship is important to them and hope you fall for it, fix it and talk about how critical it is to work things out and always give second chances.

They will play the blame game: If you fall for the gimmicks you are right back on their web of deceit. As soon as a situation arise that person will blame you for the misfortune or failure. Then pretend they no longer want to be in the relationship.

They will give the silent treatment: They’ll refuse to talk to you – not answering their phones or responding to any of your efforts to communicate with them. If they are around you they will refuse to acknowledge your presence.

Social Isolation: When you try to socialise with others, this person will try to find any excuse to blame you for not spending enough time with them and blame you for always causing a problem. And even use the opportunity to deprive you of things.

They trivialise your problems: You can never find a genuine friend in this person. They will make excuses for not talking to you e.g., being busy. And if they talk to you they make your issue seem less important or not at all. Or they may even try to tell you that you are the reason for your own problems.

There and many more, but these are just a few. Some of you may know it. I know it firsthand. Some of them could also be termed manipulation and are more in-depth.

Being aware and recognizing this behaviour will not help unless you set boundaries or rid yourself of such a burden. These aren’t the kind of baggage you want to take with you into the future. This will sorely diminish your chances of achieving your goals and living a fulfilling life.

The longer you remain in these relationships the more damage you are likely to become. Because it is you who will be expending your energy to always hold it together. Use good judgement and decide what is right for you and your well-being. You deserve the best. PLEASE LIKE AND SHARE.

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Thanksgiving: What Are You Grateful For?

It’s preferred and important to stay away from conversations relating to politics and bitter memories, religion, your ex, gossips and drama.

Growing up, one of the things I was taught, was to be thankful for everything – to have a grateful heart. Today, that lesson remains with me and I will forever be THANKFUL for it because throughout my life it has taught me so many things about gratitude and the benefits it has.

So, what are you grateful for today? There are so many things to be grateful for, friends, family, jobs, life, and health.

Then there are those who are lost and overwhelmed or feeling down at this time. May this Thanksgiving season lift your spirit and may you find it in your strength to express your gratitude.

Being grateful is showing appreciation for what you receive. It is the acknowledgement of all the things in life. Being grateful draws you towards others who are also grateful. Because good vibes recognize good vibes. Ain’t that the truth? It certainly is.

Here are 3 ways to practice gratitude if you are feeling down and a little too overwhelmed; to begin feeling more grateful for everything.

  1. Express your gratitude by writing down to yourself or anyone you are comfortable with.
  2. Try reflecting on the little things that you may have foregone and savor it.
  3. Be thankful that you are alive, Many aren’t so fortunate.

Gratitude is a lot more than mannerism and politeness. It is the expression of heartfelt genuine gratefulness.

Let us look at a few ways that gratitude can benefit us?

  • Gratitude helps to improve our sleep
  • It reduces stress
  • We become more adaptable
  • Our sleep is improve
  • Our relationships are are improve
  • It gives us peace of mind

Like any skill that is worth mastering, gratitude take practice and time to develop. Focus on the simple and valuable things. For example, your life, the air you breathe, being grateful for a friend, even your favourite pet. There is so much to be thankful for.

When you are finished you will be inspired by the change you will feel in your mood. Continue practising an attitude of gratitude each day and you will see great benefits. HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

“Acknowledging the good that you already have in your life is the foundation for all abundance.”

Eckhart Tolle

Gratitude Is Easy When Things Aren’t Going Your Way

It is easy to be carried away with the cares of life and forget to stop and appreciate things in life. And when you are going through tough times it is even more difficult to remember that there are things to be thankful for. Regardless, it is always good for us to recognize that we should be appreciative – starting from the little things.

I learned to practice an attitude of gratitude from a young age. It is profoundly effective. I have grown to understand that a simple thankfulness goes a long way.

Unfortunately, we have a society where everyone is tied up in complicated feelings. As a result, it is harder for them to express a feeling of appreciation.

The act of gratitude is easy when it’s a habit. I say this because I am of the belief when it’s embedded in you – you perceive things differently. In my experience, I constantly look for the “message” or “lesson” in circumstances and so I strongly believe there is a reason for everything hence, I choose to be thankful for everything. Others have told me that’s “weird,”

I understand that for some people this is difficult because their belief is rooted in the way they were cultured, and even their personality and that may be the reason why gratitude doesn’t come easily.

It is my opinion that when practising from a tender age one may find it easy to show appreciation as opposed to others who may find it hard to demonstrate.

Gratitude doesn’t have to be for big things and occasions. You can start with appreciating the little things. Recognize there is nothing too small to be thankful for. It could be simple as appreciating a sunny day. Don’t leave out anything when giving gratitude.

“A thankful heart is not only the greatest virtue, but the parent of all other virtue.”

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